Quicky

😂😂😂

This is almost exactly the opposite of what I was saying, and it’s a very telling interpretation.

No, I have no concern for the other men I was “competing” with. Why would I? They have absolutely zero bearing on my own successes or failure. If one of them got the girl, am I supposed to be mad about it?

As I said anecdotally, the majority of my friends met their partners on an app. There is no “I got mine”. I gave advice on what worked for me. The literal basics, widely acknowledged, that apply online or off. I’m not sure what other advice I’m supposed to offer in that respect that shows I “have empathy or concern for the other 79 men” that you’ve mentioned.

I’m also not sure what you’re talking about with regards to my concern for “the other 77 women”. Who are they? People who didn’t match with me? That’s fine - if someone’s not into my profile, then that’s okay. Do I have to be concerned for them somehow? In what way?

People have their own successes on the apps. Nearly 20% of UK adults under 50 met their partner on an app. That’s current partner - not all partners. The percentage who met anyone is higher.

To be honest if this tone is a reflection of how you talk to people online, then it goes some way to explain why you might not being seeing success on dating apps, presuming that’s the case. Try not to assume the worst.

You ever wonder what’s going on with the 77 other women you didn’t match with? Or are we supposed to believe they somehow never actually existed?

I don’t need to wonder, you can literally download your statistics, and they provide comparative results. But I would have thought the reason was obvious.

Most men literally swipe right on everyone. Most women are considerably more selective. They get more matches because chances are the guy they’ve swiped right on has already swiped right on them. That aspect is not a conspiracy.

Exactly the same as if your hot wife suddenly divorced you. There will be far more men knocking down her door than women knocking on yours.

Our Tinder experiences must have been very different.

Yes, men are competing in theory, but no more so than in real life. And the app literally puts you in contention with them.

The other thing is, if you’ve decided that it is in fact a competition, then the thing to remember is that those other people are also competing with you. Just don’t consider them, they’re not relevant to you.

My girlfriend had 80+ matches when I started talking to her. I had 3. And yet here we are. I’ve no doubt it was the same for the other women I met on there.

Dating on apps is the same as dating in real life. If you’re genuinely searching for someone, you need to get yourself noticed and be the best that you can be. The basics are equally important in both worlds. Be a good person, make people laugh, be interesting, be interested in them, don’t immediately be a thirsty prick, exercise, feel good about yourself, etc, etc.

What a boomer-ass sounding comment. Most of my friends met their partners on Tinder or Bumble, and so did I.

For people in more rural areas, shy people, or mid-life relationship-seekers/divorcees, dating apps are the absolute most efficient way of meeting people you wouldn’t otherwise normally get to.

Bot accounts may be a problem, but not everywhere, and not for everyone.

Personally, I can’t recommend dating apps enough. Boosted my confidence, made me better at conversation, allowed me to be pickier in my choices, and found me my soul mate.